Fair warning: This is a vent. I may or may not feel like this tomorrow, or the next day, or even next week. But I for sure feel this way right. this. minute. Right this minute, I would sell my kids to a passing gypsy for a bag of magical beans. I would trade them for a pedicure and a scalp massage, plus I would throw in Dear Husband. Yes, I know I’m blessed, I know why I do this, I know children are precious and blah blah blah… that’s not what this is about. It’s a vent. (more…)

Every now and then, it happens. A magical time in space where the stars and planets align, and you get the perfect moment. And you think, This is SO going on my blog.

Today’s blogging moment involves a 17th century house, canned peaches, and some cheddar cheese. (more…)

Is anyone else sitting around wondering how to get Pumpkin Tiramisu incorporated into their Thanksgiving meal?  Wowza. I told my hubs that he had to make that for me someday before I die.  Holy cow. (more…)

Last year I blogged about going to the store the day before Thanksgiving. I didn’t learn my lesson. I did it again today.

The spice aisle was still packed. (more…)

Here’s the deal.  I am very very tired of blogging. I don’t even know how to make the font cool when I blog.  I’m just that lame. (more…)

My baby. Little Sister. So far, I’m just a little surprised that she’s still alive. (more…)

The boys are out raking the yard with their dad. Thin autumn light filters through the leafless trees, making the golden leaves glow the same color as my boys’ copper heads. Their cheeks are flushed pink from the crisp air, as their little strong bodies help dad clean up the mess of autumn leaves. (more…)

OK, full disclosure - I did not write this, I don’t know who did, if you do, telling us would be great. I did not do the picture, but it was funny, so I wanted to post it up.  If you have already seen this in your email, I apologize. 

My dear friends,

Somewhat embarrassing to admit, I’m not getting an annual bonus and Christmas is tight this year. I will be making bedroom slippers for you all as gifts. Please let me know your sizes. You’ll most likely agree that it’s a splendid idea, and should you wish to do the same, I’ve included the instructions below.

How to make bedroom slippers out of maxi pads: (more…)

OK, I have no idea what “New American Cuisine” is.  Apparently I am not alone, because none of the chefs did either.

All in all, a lackluster episode, which bothers me because it could have been so cool watching them serve at craft. (more…)

It’s a book. A really, really interesting book, and because I’m not feeling particulary funny today (maybe it’s the weather?), and because I’ve been reading it, we’re going to talk about. Stick around, though, because it’s good stuff, and I’ll try my best not to spoil the whole book. Be warned, though, I’m pretty lousy about that. I once walked in on a group of people watching “Braveheart” and said, “Hey, isn’t this the one where Mel Gibson gets killed?” One guy sputtered and said, “Thanks a lot!”

(Oops.) (more…)

I went to Utah by myself this weekend.  FOR NO REASON WHATSOEVER.  So don’t ask why.  NO REASON.

Basically, I played Guitar Hero, watched movies, hung out with old friends, and went to the Gateway because that’s where my friend wanted to meet, and I couldn’t think of a different place to go.  I should have, though.  I should have suggested anything else.  Because here is my question:  WHAT IS THE DEAL WITH THE GATEWAY? (more…)

Potty training is not going well at our house. The practical wisdom is boys are harder to train, but my daughter is proving that an old wives’ tale. Case in point: the other day, still naked after her bath, she pooped on the bathroom floor. She was oblivious. When I pointed in out to her, she quizically looked at it, then at me, all rosy-cheeked and cute, and querried “Cookie, Mama?” (more…)

Come and see.

Yes, it’s that time of year again, the Heather Campbell personal essay contest! Emily Milner, assistant editor of Segullah, has published a great inside scoop for your benefit about how this whole thing works. I love being involved in this contest. Last year I spent a huge amount of time reading all of the entries, over and over, to pick the best one, and let me tell you, it was a pleasure. I know that a lot of y’all out there are excellent writers, and this is YOUR chance to shine. So, get writing already, and send it in so I can start the New Year (entries are due Dec 31 of this year) reading some awesome, awesome stuff.

The main (and only) problem with Top Chef is that it comes on too late.  Yawn.

It is just too easy at this point to pick who’s going home based on “loser edits.”  Really, it is.  The girl from Savannah whose husband is in Iraq who went home first?  I swear to you, the second they said “Iraq” and “I’m not going to sit around” (or whatever the actual quote would be) I was like “GONE!”  and poof! - apparently peeling, chopping (boisine?buisone? what was that?) and coooking with apples is very stressful. (more…)

If a doctor told YOU that you had 5 good years left in your kidneys before you might need dialysis, what super extra fun things would YOU do?

There’s another Nie Event!  I got sent an image and everything, but it was too big to upload, and then I tried to shrink it, and frankly, I’m way too technologically stupid to be a blogger, but I know how to put up a link!  So there.

Go here. 

What is it, you ask?  Why should I go there?  Oh, it’s only a spa day where all the proceeds go to Nie.  Hi, when else can you go get pampered for a good cause?  It’s in Mesa, on Nov. 22.  Enjoy.

Also, Top Chef starts tonight.  Maybe they’ll cook with leeks.

Okay, I’ve learned a lot throughout my vegetarian adventures. I now know how to cook AND pronounce “quinoa” and “spanakopita”, I know that garlic sauteed with onions is pretty much the beginning of 99% of all veg recipes, and that cooked feta has a bite to it, but often takes like vomit if you eat it as a leftover the next day.

(And I won’t even make you try it–you can just take my word on this one.) (more…)

I’m breathing weird just sitting here writing about dental visits. It’s a demon I face. I can suck it up for lots of things, but not the dentist’s chair. I’m not kidding here, I recently had to call a dozen dental offices before I could find one that would get me high enough to get through my once-every-couple-of-years cleaning - never mind the sheer panic that accompanies the needles and drilling.
I don’t know what it is specifically: The hands in my mouth? The gagging? The bright light? The “dental” smell? The power tool noises? The sensation of a sharp object being repeatedly drawn across a chalk-board like surface IN MY HEAD? Not sure. It may not be any ONE thing. But I tell you what, I hate going to the Dentist. (more…)

Okay, so I keep running into people who tell me, ‘Oh, I LOVE MMW!” Or, as I get in touch with people on Facebook, they tell me, “Oh, yeah, I’ve been reading MMW for years.”

Oh. Really? Wow. Um, hey there everybody. Nice to have you here. (more…)