By The Wiz
Well, obviously the blogging here has taken a turn for the non-existent. Apparently summer is kind of busy. Or laziness-inducing. Or whatever. But I have some thoughts. So here I spew.
The other day I was deeply disturbed by the state of the world. I had been watching a BBC documentary about brothers and sisters who grew up apart, but met as adults, KNOWING they were siblings, who were married and/or living as couples. “Genetic sexual attraction” it was called. It disturbed me.
Then as I checked my yahoo email account, (mostly spam, I KNOW you were dying to know) I saw that Mel Gibson’s girlfriend was pregnant, he has no plans to marry her, and Brooke Shields wishes she had done the deed much earlier than age 22. Also, Boston is probably going to fall into the sea. (I mean, I know I don’t like Boston much, the weather’s crappy, but it doesn’t deserve an Atlantean fate.) The world depressed me.
Clearly, this generation has the WORST PROBLEMS EVER, and the world was going to end soon. There was no other option. Nobody before us has had to deal with the crap we have, and the next generation? What do they know? I mean, hey those pioneers up in heaven? They are going to look at us in awe and ask us how we possibly lived through it and managed to stay faithful. Heck, they might even BOW DOWN.
How lucky was the generation before mine? I mean, hey what did those boomers have to live through? THEY didn’t have Internet p*rn attacking people like Devil’s Snare and killing their souls. THEY didn’t have the swine flu. THEY didn’t have High Fructose Corn Syrup advertising itself on TV. What did they have? The 60s? OK, that was probably a little tense. Vietnam? Also, kind of a problem. And the music and fashions of the 70s are probably best forgotten. All righty then, so they had their issues as well. But I’m sure if you go back a little further, THEN things were peachy.
Oh, well, there was that whole WWII thing, with the Nazis and stuff. That was Bad in ways I can’t comprehend. OK then, before that! The Great Depression. Hmmm…..glad I didn’t have to live through that, and before that, they had the Spanish influenza, which actually did kill bunches and bunches of people, and the bloodbath that was WWI definitely wasn’t a party either.
However, I’m SURE that if you were born in the 1800’s you didn’t have NEARLY the problems MY GENERATION has to face! Of course, you didn’t have running water, either. Forget that.
I suppose the world has survived worse things then Hollywood celebrities acting dopey. And people like me whining about it. It’ll keep on surviving, even if Boston does fall into the sea. (And I’m sorry, but I have a hard time believing that one. Although I know, if you can’t trust Yahoo news…..)




I have heard that Boston is sinking at some constant rate. It has been doing so for years. But what do you expect when you take an island, fill the Boston Harbor with it, and then build a huge city on it? The world has had better ideas, I’m sure.
Comment #1 by Heather O.May 29th, 2009 at 12:06 pmOh, and thanks for the term genetic sexual attraction, in quotes, on our front page. That won’t bring creepy Google search engine traffic at all….
Comment #2 by Heather O.May 29th, 2009 at 12:07 pmNo problem. Thank YOU for typing it again.
Comment #3 by The WizMay 29th, 2009 at 12:09 pmI must have been reading too fast, because I misread, “There was that whole Wii thing, with the Nazis and stuff” and wondered if they sell war games for the Wii. (I thought it was all sports.) I get a lot of my news from the BBC. It is so much more highbrow. From this morning: “Demand growing for squirrel pie.” “Susan Boyle moved to ’safe house.’” And “Illinois baby obtains gun permit.”
Comment #4 by ResearcherMay 29th, 2009 at 12:32 pmDude. Music and fashion in the 70s ruled.
Comment #5 by Susan MMay 29th, 2009 at 12:57 pmI started reading this, certain I was going to turn up my baby-boomer nose at the whippersnapper who thinks the world began the day she and her friends entered kindergarten.
I humbly apologize.
Oh, and to do my part toward bringing in traffic: “genetic sexual attraction.”
Comment #6 by Ardis ParshallMay 29th, 2009 at 1:04 pmThat brother sister thing — creepy. That’s all. Just creepy.
Comment #7 by meemsMay 29th, 2009 at 1:07 pmGeorge D. Watt, the first baptized convert in England and the man to whom we owe practically our entire tradition of verbatim records of conference talks, grew up apart from his half-sister, Jane Brown.
George and Jane married in Salt Lake City in 1852, and became the parents of three children.
Just sayin’.
Comment #8 by Ardis ParshallMay 29th, 2009 at 1:29 pmArdis Parshall, are you freakin kidding me? I’m more than a little creeped out but the Hawaiians were doing it for centuries too. Maybe I just know a little too much about genetics but yuck!
Comment #9 by Sues2u2May 29th, 2009 at 1:44 pmand there was adam & eve, and abraham & sarah (some confusion on that whole situation), not to mention lot’s daughters and king david’s kids… the OT has some of that too.
Comment #10 by anitaMay 29th, 2009 at 2:01 pmWell this is a fun topic, and I wish I could share a creepy story.
Also, if I ever have to live for more than a week without running water, heads will roll. Possibly my own.
Comment #11 by KrisMay 29th, 2009 at 2:24 pmI did not really expect this to turn into a creepy brother sister marrying thread, so sorry about that. Carry on, though.
Comment #12 by The WizMay 29th, 2009 at 2:40 pmSorry, The Wiz, for my contribution to it.
Just think of the fun you’re going to have when your kids are teenagers. Not only can you freak out about the Lost City of Boston and the current celebrity crises, but you’ll have to listen to your kids whining about whatever angsty thing is the thing then, all the while dealing with your parents’ health and psychological problems caused by growing up on high fructose corn syrup and having to wear those ’70s fashions to their high school prom.
Comment #13 by Ardis ParshallMay 29th, 2009 at 2:46 pmWell, now, that’s something to look forward to. My parents are a little older than 70’s to prom (that was more my older siblings, and man, did they look HAWT!) I’m sure the HFCS will kill them all, though. Actually, I haven’t seen those ads, lately. Did they pull them, on account of the ridiculousness of claiming it was OK to eat it?
Comment #14 by The WizMay 29th, 2009 at 3:14 pmAll I know is I’m not paying for two weddins.
Comment #15 by Lindsay1138May 29th, 2009 at 7:38 pmI have to say that I found it incredibly ironic that the HFCS ads came on just before there were reports that pretty much all HFCS is contaminated with mercury. And not only is it contaminated, but the companies know it is, because they actually use mercury to treat the vats that it’s mixed in or stored in or something. Maybe that’s why they pulled the ads. (Also, it made me glad that my kids get very little HFCS — not because I’m such a great parent to feed them only healthy things or anything, just because it’s mostly in things that they’re allergic to.)
Comment #16 by VadaMay 29th, 2009 at 7:48 pmI what I couldn’t stand about the HFCS ads is that they claimed it is okay in moderation, except that it’s in absolutely everything! You can’t have it in moderation! Oh, and I remember seeing an old ad (I’m thinking from the 60’s. No, I’m not old enough to have seen it originally) advertising the energy producing power of sugar. So give your kids sugar to get through their school day! It was hilarious.
Comment #17 by NaomiMay 29th, 2009 at 7:57 pmOK, Lindsay, that cracked me up. Naomi, you reminded me, there are some great parodies on youtube of the HFCS ads. “You know that has tobacco in it.” “So?” “So you know what they say about tobacco….” “What? That it’s an agricultural product? That it helps keep the weight off? That, like sugar, it’s fine in moderation?”
Comment #18 by The WizMay 29th, 2009 at 9:30 pmDon’t worry about HFCS, bottled water will get us first.
Comment #19 by CDMay 30th, 2009 at 9:06 amThen there is sodium aluminum phosphate to consider….
Comment #20 by Melissa McMay 30th, 2009 at 10:55 amAnd the fumes from your wall to wall carpet is bad too…
Comment #21 by mormonhermitmomMay 30th, 2009 at 11:02 amHey….What happened to the banner ads?
Comment #22 by lizMay 30th, 2009 at 6:51 pmHey….What happened to the banner ads?
Comment #23 by lizMay 30th, 2009 at 6:51 pmI can’t see the google ads any more either. They’ve been missing for a while.
Comment #24 by Pmom@ChocolateandGarlic.comMay 30th, 2009 at 8:45 pm