By Heather O.
I have to come clean. I just have to confess it. I love Buffy the Vampire Slayer.
It all started when I was pregnant with my son, and dh was in law school. I would come home from work, exhausted and puking, and dh would be studying. So I would park my sorry pregnant body on the couch, and, sadly, zone out in front of the TV because I was too exhausted to do anything else. This is when I discovered the magic that is Buffy.
I discovered this show in it’s second to last season, when they had already started re-runs on the FX channel. It’s dark, cheesy, violent, and very funny, all in one show. I mean, what’s not to love? I was quickly hooked.
I kept my addiction a secret, because really, who wants to admit that she likes a show with the words “Buffy” and “Vampire Slayer” in it? But my secret slowly leaked out. And one day, I was talking to a friend, who finally just asked me what I see in a show that has mummies, scary-toothed walking undead, and black magic, sometimes all in one episode. And I told her, “It’s because Buffy is a serious buttkicker. It’s all about her power.” And really, that’s true. For those of you who don’t watch this show on a regular basis, the “slayer” has superhuman strength, heals quickly from wounds inflicted by vampires, and can do some seriously cool Jackie-Chanesque moves. She basically rocks. Who wouldn’t want to be her?
Ok, so then the show had it’s last season. I mourned the loss of my main entertainment, and we all moved on with our lives.
Then I met Elasti-Girl.
Again, for those of you who are not familiar with this particular hero, Elasti-Girl, a.k.a Helen Parr, also totally rocks. She can stretch her body in all sorts of cool ways, and knows how to fly a jet. She also gave all that up to be a stay-at-home mom, but then had to resume her hero-work when the world became in need, once again, of saving. (I won’t tell you any more, in case you haven’t already seen ‘The Incredibles’.) We recently just purchased “The Incredibles” DVD, and while watching the special features, the director said, “I just loved the idea of having a Superhero as a mom.” The director also specifically made her a stay-at-home mom, because he likes that idea so much, too.
And watching that, I thought, “Hey, I’m a mom. I want to be a Superhero, too!”
But the question looms: Do I still want to be Buffy, or should I aspire to be Elasti-Girl? I mean, who would make the better mother? Apparantly Elasti-Girl makes a mean meatloaf along with all the rest of her talents, but Buffy has been known to take out half a dozen vampires on her own. It’s a tough call, don’t you think? Also, Elast-Girl gets to wear a very cool outfit when she fights evil, while Buffy stays in her hip, I-live-in-Southern-California gear when she’s out patrolling. (The show takes place in a fictional town in Southern California, which, as my dh says, is a very plausible location for the center of all that is nasty and vile.)
So let’s take a vote. As mothers, who would you rather be, Buffy, or Elastic-Girl?
And while y’all are deciding, my son has just spilled his entire glass of milk on the floor, so I have to don my own Superhero outfit and (gasp!) save the carpet from ruination! And after that, I might even have to (oh no!) save the laundry from the dryer! I swear, a Superhero’s work is never done.