Our ward’s trunk or treat is tonight, so I went to Target to get some candy.

I think shopping for Halloween candy is stressful.

First, there’s the fact that there are about 4 aisles JUST of candy. How on earth am I supposed to choose? What kind of candy is in these days? Should I buy candy that *I* like, so I can happily eat the leftovers, or should I buy candy that I hate, to help stave off the forthcoming holiday food binge? Should I buy candy that will tempt trick-or-treaters to think we’re the “cool” house, or should I just grab a bag of Nerds and call it good?

Also, there’s the issue of how MUCH to get. Our neighborhood gets a healthy amount of trick or treaters, but not, like, a million or anything. Will there 50 this year, or 100 kids? Should I get enough to give out just 1 treat, or 3?

Throw in the trunk or treat tonight, and I find myself staring at two bags of 135 pieces of chocolate each, wondering if, at $14.99 a pop, 370 pieces of candy is sufficient.

Then I put the two bags in the cart, and it looks puny. So I start adding things— more candy, some stickers, oooh, playdough, kids like playdough, and OMGosh here are some cheap halloween TATTOOS!. Everybody likes tattoos, and we’ll be the house where people say, “Remember the year the O house handed out tattoos? MAN they are awesome!” And dentists and dental hygienists all over the nation will praise our name FOREVER.

I stop to listen to the angels singing in my head.

And suddenly my cart is full and I wind myself to the checkout only to reminded as I stare at my load that my husband and I just went over our budget this week and that $100 worth of trick-or-treat goodness, just to impress some sugar-crazed kids who will forget our house in their sugar-induced comas at the end of the night is probably not in said budget.

So what do I put back on the shelf?

Seriously, first world Halloween problems? They are the worst.