By Tracy M
By now, you all are probably so done with my musings on the finer points (ha!) of mamaries. This is it, I promise! I’ve pontificated on the medical healing of breast reduction surgery, the special level of torture that is pumping everything your baby eats, and my own grief at not being able to nurse. But I have something to add, something I never thought I would say; I have a baby that is nursing.
When I last posted a Mammary, I was in the throes of grief, and had all but thrown in the proverbial towel. I had bound myself and started giving my baby formula. Doing as the lactation nurse suggested, my milk supply was all but annihilated, but I just couldn’t bring myself to completely stop. So I was pumping a bottle or two for her each day- just enough that my milk wasn’t gone, and just enough that I was hopeful she was getting some good from it. Then, one day as I was pumping and she was rooting and definitely hungry, I thought, “Hey, maybe..?”. Well, it never worked with the boys, but the thought was tempting (inspired?) nonetheless… Especially since she had been so eager at first. So I picked her up and gave it a shot.
Well, guess what? It seems The Voracious One has done what over 1000 hours on a breast pump could not do. Yes, my little Hoover has managed to latch on, correctly, and for the first time in my life, I have a baby that is getting her milk directly from my body. Miracles…They really do happen. Granted it’s a small miracle in the Grand Scheme, but it’s my miracle, and I will take it and shout Hossanah!
Is it because I made such a big deal about not being able to nurse, and I needed to be shown who was really The Boss? Could be. Is it because I had the faith to try even when I knew it was “unlikely”? Maybe. Is it because this a different baby and she has a much stronger urge to suck, a hungry tummy and a patient personality? Possibly. Perhaps it is because of the reduction surgery making everything a more “manageable” size? Probably. I think it’s likely a fair mixture of all these things.
Either way, I’m ready to publicly have a big ole slice of Humble Pie, to eat some Crow and have a side of My Hat. Bring it on! I’m hungry! Never in my life have I been so completely overjoyed to be Wrong!