By Heather O.
DH likes to run. So do I, or, rather, I did before I gave birth. It’s hard to be motivated to get back into it, especially when you have to strategically plan around nursing sessions. But Dh still tries to go, and frankly, lately that has made me a little cranky.
Finally, yesterday it came to a head, and Dh said, “Why do you get so bugged when I go running?”
And this is what I told him.
Because you get to go running whenever you want. You don’t have to worry about the kids, or nursing, or anything. If it is a beautiful day, you can just go.
Because it feels like your life has so much more freedom than mine. You can even get a haircut without having to schedule it, you can just go when you hair gets shaggy. Did you know that I haven’t even had a hair cut since the baby was born?
Because you get to be alone all day, doing your own stuff, while I am never alone. I am attached, literally, to a little being who, yes, is super cute and we prayed real hard to get her but sometimes I feel like she is sucking the life blood out of my body and eventually I will just be left an empty shell.
Because you get to go to work and do all this cool stuff, and people read what you write and you get to be invited to all these conferences where people ask your opinion about things and the only person who asks my opinion is my 5 year old who is usually asking about whether or not I think his newest acquisition for his pet’s rooms on Webkinz world is cool, which means that when I am asked my opinion it is about something THAT DOESN’T EVEN EXIST.
Because I love being a mom and I know I chose this route but it’s really hard sometimes to realize that I walked away from a career that I would have loved and it would be nice to get dressed for a different reason besides the fact that I don’t want you to see me in my pajamas when you get home from work, and that even though I know that being a mom is the most important thing in the world, sometimes I just miss wearing pant suits and my little clippy nametag that has my picture on it which means I’m super cool.
“You think all of that EVERY time I go running?”
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