Hope everybody is partying hard today.

P.S. Does anybody know how to make pickles?

Pixar knocks it out of the park again. Wow.  (more…)

Okay, let’s be honest here.  How many of you have ever dreamed of being a model?  C’mon, hands up.  In every dopey looking 12 year old’s heart there is the belief that she is a beautiful model, just waiting to be set free, as long as she had the right make-up, the right clothes, the right photographer, and, of course, a little time to get rid of those pesky glasses and braces.

Yeah, that dream of mind ended this weekend. (more…)

This is a guest post by Mo Mommy- and a Public Service Announcement.

1) Don’t. Seriously, unless they’re so young that they just sleep all the time, or you’re close enough to home that you can go sleep there, just say no. Should you fail to heed my warning and go anyway… (more…)

Without my children.  I left on a jet plane and took off for the weekend to giggle and laugh and talk and eat too much chocolate with the Segullah girls.  I don’t think I’ve laughed so hard in a long time.

I took the red eye back, which usually makes you feel like your entire body has been beaten with a stick.  Then I was up most of the night with a grumpy baby and a squirmy 6 year old, who was sleeping with me because my nephew and his cousin decided to visit and we were all squishing.   So in other words, I haven’t been blogging because I’m totally wasted.

It was worth it, though.  So worth.  But I have to say sorry to Emily M, who thought I was short and just a bit chubby.  Didn’t mean to disappoint, babe.

I’ll be back soon.  After I sleep.  For a long, long time.

I’m supposed to be in Utah right now.  I’m supposed to be packing up the remains of the house, selling off a bunch of crap priceless heirlooms, and generally seeing people I don’t get to see as often as I’d like. 

I’m not there, obviously.  (more…)

Does this makes sense to anybody?

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So I’ve been really having a hard time writing lately. I don’t feel very quippy and my summer thus far has been pretty “eh”. Mostly busy busy stuff that MIGHT be interesting for individual posts but I just don’t know if I have it in me right now. Since summer is all about the lazy, I’m gonna wrap it all up in one glob for you. (more…)

And, by the way, I know most of you don’t know her, but I still have to talk about my friend Sandra, who not only found a tick crawling across her 2 year old daugther’s face, but called me screaming to tell me all about how she is ready to move already. But since said 2 year old also got into the bucket of WHITE PAINT yesterday and left little while paint footprints all over the newly laid hard wood floor, and Sandra couldn’t clean them up because she was so busy cleaning up other paint spills, the little footprints are now permanent, which means that so is Sandra’s residence in that house.  Ah, 2 year olds.  Gotta love ‘em if you aren’t going to strangle them and throw them out the window to be devoured by dingos. (more…)

How much do you pay your babysitters?

My buyer backed out.  I’m so screwed. 

This is a guest post from Melinda, and she is wondering if anybody else has ever had this experience.

My baby was born with a lopsided head. The right side is so flat it is nearly concave, and the right side of his skull is higher than the left side. His head shape affects his face shape; his right eye opens wider, and his cheeks look different. It isn’t incredibly obvious, especially if you see his good side. But you do notice it if you do more than glance at him. (more…)

“During this test you answered questions which measured your ’spatial skills’. Based on how you scored, we could conclude that your spatial skills are poor or inadequate. This means that you are inept at visualizing objects in your mind’s eye and are not able to rotate figures mentally in any dimension.”

Basically, my brain wishes desperately that we lived in a two dimensional world. (more…)

Yesterday, following a link on this fun and fabulous new blog, I made a half-dozen little dresses for Abby in the course of about two hours. It is a great way to use up t-shirts that have gotten a bit too short, or are otherwise on the way out, and you only need about 1/4 yard of fabric to make the skirt. Seriously, anyone with ANY ability to sew a strait line on a machine CAN make these. Yes, even you, Wiz! (directions below the fold) (more…)

I’d like to dedicate this post to my friend who has found many ticks on her and her babies this summer.  She reads the blog, and says we need to discuss this very important topic. Sandra, honey, this is for you babe.  And if our traffic tanks because of this, I’m totally coming after you.

One fourth of July, DH and I decided to take our son out to a park and have a family BBQ.  We roasted the meat, the marshmallows, rolled around in the grass, wore our then 2 year old son out, and returned to the homestead tired and happy.  We put our child down for the night, and I hopped in the shower to get rid of the campfire, smokey, sweaty ickiness that accompanies summers in the south.

As I was getting dressed, I noticed a piece of dirt that wouldn’t come off.  So I brushed it off.  It still didn’t come off.  That’s weird, I thought, and I took a closer look.

It was a piece of dirt with legs.  (more…)

At Segullah. If you’ve never read this woman, come on over and discover what you’ve been missing.

Yessirree, I have done it. I’m ready for that new medication that is supposed to work miracles with my blood pressure. She’s all set.

What am I doing? Oh, this? This isn’t nursing, this is just some comfort sucking. She’s totally weaned. Seriously. Oh, this nursing bra I’m wearing? I mean, it’s not really a nursing bra–it just supports me really well, and is sort of convenient if,you know, just in case she needs something, like if she’s really distraught, or if she’s really out of control, or if I’m lying on the couch reading my book and she comes wandering up and pulls at my shirt wanting to nurse. You know, emergencies.

But really, other than a little swig in the morning after she gets out of her crib, maybe some alone time with her in the afternoon before she goes down for a nap, and some nursing in the middle of the night when she wakes up and won’t go back to sleep, she is totally done.

Totally. Absolutely. 100% weaned. You betcha.

Excuse me, I must go. My milk is coming in.

Not that my daughter drinks any breast milk anymore.  The milk–it’s just for show. 

Really.

http://www.imdb.com:80/video/imdb/vi2380464409/

In case you’re wondering, my sister sends me these.  I’m a Twilight fan, yes, but I’m not obsessed.

Also, I have nothing to post about.

So my husband, my father and I were chatting about politics. My dad mentioned Angela Merkel.

DH, to me, “She’s the Chancillor of Germany.” (more…)

There is a cake, sold at Safeway, (and if you don’t have a Safeway, or it’s not at your Safeway, please don’t come at me with pitchforks) which is my new favorite cake of all time.  Please serve it at my funeral (you know, in about 50-60 years time), and every time somebody takes a bite, I want them to say, “Wow, that Wiz?  She knew a good cake when she ate one.”

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